Buzzed on red wine
I watched
Niagara fall over your shoulder.
Premature showdown
In Honeymoon Town.

The first time we took our clothes off
It was to Monty Python,
Not Simply Red
Not Marvin Gaye.

"How to protect yourself
From an assailant
Carrying fresh fruit"...

For months I couldn't bring myself
To tell you this,
When we made love that night
I heard Eric Idle ask,
"What if I'm assaulted by a
Man carrying a pointed stick?"

Nor has much changed since.